Two Men and Peru

When I was down in Ecuador, I had an interesting experience with two men who helped me get into Peru. Looking back – well, it’s embarrassing looking back, so I try not to do it too much with this story – but looking back I would have done several things several different ways. Yet, it was still an fun couple of days.

So, basically, if you were a poor, weary traveler in Ecuador then you traveled by bus. Since I was a smart poor, weary traveler – I traveled by nite bus. The whole time I was in Ecuador I really wanted to go to the two countries that bordered us: Columbia and Peru. Columbia is a whole ‘nother story, but one weekend I did decide to go to Peru. It was about 15 hours away by bus. So early one evening I boarded a bus destined for Peru…and I was sitting next to destiny.

Actually, I wasn’t sitting next to destiny. It was more like stupidity. Actually, no, stupidity was who I met when I got off the bus. Ah, but enough attempts at humor. I digress.

In reality, I ride on this bus all nite and into the next morning. When we finally pulled up at the border of Ecuador and Peru, I pulled my sweaty self off of the seat, grabbed by way-too-big backpack, and got off the bus. Immediately when I got off the bus, I was bombarded by dozens of Peruvian men vying for my attention (and money). They all wanted to help me get across the border. So – being the innocent fresh meat that I was – I went with the guy who was yelling the loudest. That’s just the principle I live by.

Without a word he shuffled me quickly over to a waiting car. I got in the backseat and he and his friend were in the front seat. We started driving before we even started talking (not the wisest course of action). The following conversation ensued. I will translate it into English here.

Me: I need to go to Peru.
Them: Yes, yes, Peru. We will help you. Yes.
Me: So you know how to get me into Peru?
Them: Yes, yes, Peru. We will help you. We are helpers and friends.
Me: Umm, where are we going right now?
Them: (silence).

So now that I had confirmed what was going on and still very confused, we continued driving. After driving about 2 minutes through this marketplace that kept getting more narrow and more narrow, we arrived at this makeshift parking lot. From there we walked for about 40 minutes through another marketplace and to a different car. When we got in the car, the guys asked me if I had my papers. I looked blankly at them.

So after walking back to the car and driving to the Ecuadorian Immigration Office, we then drove back to the parking lot, walked the 40 minutes back to the other car, and started driving. We drove for about an hour to this small office: Peru Immigration Center. Once we got there, the guys told me that I needed to give them my passport and that they would then go and talk to their friends. At this point I still really don’t know who these guys are, I have literally no idea where we are or even what country we are in, I have no idea how to get back to Quito, and I am keeping a firm grip on my backpack and the door next to me unlocked. After much haggling, I finally gave them a copy of my passport and some American granola bars. They said this would suffice.

I sat in the car alone for about ten minutes. Then all of a sudden the two guys come back running. They sprint to the car, jump inside, and put the pedal to the metal getting out of there. At this point, I didn’t even ask what happened. I simply held onto my backpack and kept the door unlocked. But – after some more interesting maneuvers through markets and a quick business deal later – we finally made it back to the bus station. They then told me that I owed them 200 dollars each for their services. Riiiiiiight. We haggled some more and finally came to an agreement: 10 dollars each…and another granola bar.